The Church visible and invisible

This is a reprise of a post I wrote back in December, 2006. Looking through my blog for something else, I found this, and decided to repost it as a companion to my recent post, What price, salvation? Not much has changed, as far as I can tell. The first line of this post is still true of me; the last paragraph is still true of the Church (from my limited point of view). Christ have mercy on us all, and forgive us for our small and large betrayals of His love.

It has been and continues to be a real struggle for me, this concept—"the Church."

Until this year that's almost over, to me "the Church" meant first, the local congregation of which I am a member, and second, the worldwide community of Christians that confess the historic faith of (at least) the first ecumenical synod of Nicæa (AD 325), whether or not they know the "symbol" of that synod (called by some, the "Nicene Creed").

But back to the topic, the church, visible and invisible. This is a struggle for me.

The church visible, this is the institutional church in all of its forms. I only know this church visible as it is in America, but I'm guessing it's the same in most places. The church visible has form, has rules, has systems, has an inside and an outside, has an architectural presence, has a distinctive culture, has professionals and laymen.

The church visible operates very much like a business, far more than one would expect from simply reading the gospels and epistles. Its hierarchy operates pretty much like that of any secular institution, and its employees, the clergy, find themselves pidgeonholed by both themselves and the laity as a professional caste, whose success or failure rides on management skills and devising programs to keep their people busy.

In the churches that are run by laymen, such as my own, those selected to parish councils and similar structures are generally the wealthy and those with business savvy and connexions. And why not? They're needed if the church is to have a successful building program and stewardship campaign. The church visible gives glory to God by investing its money with great acumen. After all, it doesn't want to be classified with the steward in the parable of the Talents, who hid the one talent in the ground to turn it over to the Master without interest, and get cast into the outer darkness.

In the last building program at my church, for example, the emphasis was giving glory to God by expanding our facilities. Just like a big business. It's a good thing God's our boss! And we sure showed Him we were worthy! People were encouraged during that campaign to reveal what they gave and challenge others to outgive them! We were talked to by wealthy patrons and encouraged by them "to give till it feels good." And the beat goes on… Just today, our loquacious presbyter gave his confession publicly that he hadn't paid his pledge as much as he'd thought, but that he made up for it, by prepaying the rest of the pledge through year's end right now. His advice to us was to do the same and, what's more, to tell at least one other person that you had paid up your pledge ahead of time, and encourage them to do the same! This is the "church visible" where I live. How about you?

What I have come to see and participate in at least a little this year is the church invisible. The visible church at regular intervals pays its respects to this invisible church by calling them "unsung heroes, the uncanonised unknown saints," and the like. Sometimes they even drag out a story or a legend about one of these crossbearers and extols them, especially in my church. But to what effect? Hearing Fr. Paul rattle off in perfect koiné Greek at the end of liturgy a half dozen or more names of saints being commemorated, lickedy-split, wow! I'm always so impressed! How can he do that?

The church invisible. How do you know when you're approaching the borderlands of the invisible church? You begin to take on the state of invisibility yourself.

The best thing to do when you sense this happening is… to run even faster after Jesus! Don't look back! Strain ahead for what is still to come. Accept the loss of everything and look on all the advantages you have in the world and even in the visible church as so much rubbish. Why? Because all these things are really disadvantages, as holy apostle Paul declares in his letter to the church at Philippi (Philippians 3:2-16). Decide now and every day to follow the call of Jesus Christ, decide once and for all that "all I want is to know Christ and the power of His resurrection and to share His sufferings by reproducing the pattern of His death" (Philippians 3:10 JB).

How do you enter the ranks of the invisible church? By paying your tithe with more than money, by not looking to be thanked, by announcing the Word of God without charge, fear or praise, by emptying yourself to assume the conditions of a slave, by putting yourself in places where faith is not only possible but inevitable, by serving those whom the world considers unworthy, because by doing so you turn tables on the world—the Word of God calls people like this, those of whom the world was not worthy (Hebrews 11:38). The author of Hebrews continues giving good instructions for those who are willing to enter the ranks of the church invisible…

"With so many witnesses in a great cloud on every side of us, we too, then, should throw off everything that hinders us, especially the sin that clings so easily, and keep running steadily in the race we have started. Let us not lose sight of Jesus, who leads us in our faith and brings it to perfection." (Hebrews 12:1-2)

"Three times Jesus encourages His disciples by saying, 'Fear not.' (Matthew 10:26-39) Although their sufferings are now secret [invisible], they will not always be so: some day they will be manifest before God and man. However secret these sufferings are at present, they have their Lord's promise that they will be eventually brought to the light of day. … Those who are still afraid of men have no fear of God, and those who have fear of God have ceased to be afraid of men. All preachers of the gospel will do well to recollect this saying daily. … We are in God's hands. Therefore, 'Fear not.' "

— Dietrich Bonhoeffer, The Cost of Discipleship, "The Decision"

One final thought. Yes, in the Orthodox Church, the visible church is plastered with icons, that is, images of the saints, to remind us of what the author of Hebrews wrote, "With so many witnesses in a great cloud on every side of us… " When we worship there, we are visibly present and the icons are visibly present, to incite us to look beyond them to the invisible presence of the saints. I almost wrote, "What if we took seriously…" but instead, I want to say, Just take God at His Word and "throw off everything that hinders" you, "especially the sin that clings so easily…" What sin is that? The sin of being satisfied with the externals, with what can be seen, heard, smelled, tasted and touched in the church visible. Stand up, stand up for Jesus! Then, follow Him, no looking back! The visible church with its visible icons fades out as the church invisible with its living icons invisible to the world reveals itself—and you among them, a living icon.

Yes, go with Jesus.

What price, salvation?

There is a strange disconnect between what people say they want and what they really want, and yet they claim to be honest in their convictions. They declare their intentions and then go about laying down plans that cannot possibly bring them to their destination. What is wrong with us? Why do we try so hard to live up to our built-in law of failure?

A young man goes to seminary because he feels called to be a priest in a church where to be ordained one must be married, or else become a lifelong celibate and be ordained as a priest-monk (this is the law of the Orthodox Church). He declares that he wants to be married, and there is no shortage of young women who want to marry a man who has been ‘trained’ to be a priest. They are women who want to be a presbytera, a presbyter’s wife, some for right reasons, others for religious prestige. The young man looks them over, then overlooks them, and pursues all the wrong women, in all the wrong places, and one day wakes up to find out his life is nearly half spent, he is still unmarried, and what of the call on his life? What has he put ahead of what he says he wants? How can he have failed to realise that if you really want something, you remove all obstacles, and pursue it relentlessly? He understands priorities in lesser things. How has he failed to apply the same principle to what he says is most important to him? Marriage, priesthood, but at what price? That is the real question.

We all know what the Church is, at least we ought to know, if we read our bibles, if we pray, and if we try to follow Christ in everyday life. When we are honest with ourselves, how much of what we experience in the church ‘we go to’ is like what we know the Church is? True, that may be an unfair question, but only in minor respects. We are used to massive failure in human society at large, and in human relationships up close. We have learned to adapt, ‘to roll with the punches,’ to be forgiving and indulgent, to accept the fact that ‘nobody’s perfect.’ We’ve taught ourselves not to expect the best, even when our faith in Christ keeps telling us to expect, not just the best, but ‘the resurrection of the dead,’ as we used to say in the Symbol of Nicaea before they ‘retranslated’ it to conform with modern churchly ‘norms’—it is now, ‘I look for,’ instead of, ‘I expect.’ Hey! I don’t look for the resurrection of the dead, I expect it! And it’s not my human pride, my ego or my flesh telling me to expect this: it’s the Spirit of the living God, living in me, who teaches me to expect it, and not merely look for it.

What do we find in church, then? They say that the Church is a hospital, that it is a place where the sick go to be healed. A nice metaphor, coming from the Orthodox East where sin is considered not so much a crime to be punished as it is a sickness to be cured. This is not an unhealthy attitude. It gives hope and relieves us somewhat of our natural instinct to blame and guilt-trip ourselves.

So we’re sick, that’s all it is! Well, that means we can slow down, take it easy, follow instructions, take our medicines, and presently we will be well again. Not only that, we have this beautiful hospital, with beautiful procedures, we are simply surrounded by beauty, and we’ve been told, ‘Beauty will save the world,’ so we can be comfortable and content, as we wait to be made whole. This is the view from the patient’s bed. We are told to be patient and follow instructions, and everything will right itself, almost magically, and we will be well again. But how long have we been lying there? Do we even know what being healthy feels like? And most importantly, do we really want to be made well?

A church says that they follow Christ, that He alone is Holy, that He alone is Lord. They say that they have seen the Light, that they have found the true faith, and that the Trinity has saved them. That’s great! But what of the others, those who can’t say these things? Those who don’t even know these things are possible? Who is supposed to tell them? Who to show them? We already know the answer to that—‘Here I am, send me!’ (Isaiah 6:8)

We go to church, and we hear the priest or deacon say—if they are good preachers—that we are the Church, not just the priests, and that ‘the great commission’ to ‘make disciples of all nations’ is our responsibility, not just theirs.

Fine rhetoric, this exhortation, very evangelical, but nothing more than fine rhetoric if it is not backed up by actions. What happens if some of us take this responsibility to heart, and go forth two by two into the world to fulfill it? Are we supported by these same preachers? What preparations are they willing to take on behalf of our ‘mission’ and our ‘ministry’? Do they even know what preparations to take? Can it be, that all we have to offer the outside world looking in on us, is a once or twice yearly lecture series on such things as the history of the Church or its teachings ‘in our tradition, we…’, an invitation to come and ‘help us to get ready for the next festival,’ and of course, ‘just come and worship with us’?

I used to think the last one—just come and worship with us—was the best, and that it was enough, but honestly, it isn’t. We are not medieval Eastern Europe, where illiterate, barbaric people can come and be ‘awed by the beauty’ of our liturgical services. For them, perhaps, this wall of beauty was a real window into the Eternal, because they had little other possibility of access. For us today, it really can become just a wall. Why? Because we have advantages, yet we don't make use of them. We can read. Bibles can be picked up in any language or dialect. Among us are experienced and knowledgeable ‘lay’ people, as well as clergy. If we rely on just the services to somehow magically inform and transform people, we are not giving them their true value, and we are lying to ourselves.

Christ came to make an end of magic, as holy father Ignatios of Antioch wrote to the church at Ephesos, “…every kind of magic was destroyed, and every bond of wickedness disappeared; ignorance was removed, and the old kingdom abolished, God Himself being manifested in human form for the renewal of eternal life. And now that took a beginning which had been prepared by God. Henceforth all things were in a state of tumult, because He meditated the abolition of death” (Ignatios to the Ephesians, ch 19). If this was true and well-understood in the time of the early fathers, before the onslaught of the ‘dark ages’ submerged the Hellenic and Christian spirit, and continuing from the gospels and the apostles, how much more true today, when we have finally overcome those ‘dark ages’?

Where does this leave the churches?
Back to the statement made at the outset, there is a strange disconnect between what people say they want and what they really want, and yet they claim to be honest in their convictions.

What does the Church exist for?
Whom does it exist for?
They say it is a hospital for the sick, and that Christ is the Physician. Well and good.
Have they removed all obstacles to that purpose?
Have they laid out plans that facilitate it?
Have they got the priorities right?
Are the sick able to meet the Physician?
Are the instructions and medicines they are being administered working?
Are people being made well?

Or are secondary needs taking priority?
Are people being allowed to develop addictions to the medicines, dependence on the clinical staff, and diverted from getting to know their Physician personally?
Are the patients being administered cosmetic solutions to their real ailments, making them ‘look good’ to themselves and each other, while their critical illnesses remain untreated, because there’s no time for that, and no need?
Is a kind of spiritual homeopathy being applied, smaller and smaller doses of the same poison that created the symptoms, until these very ‘medicines’ have become nothing more than placebos, and health and recovery are redefined as ‘what the doctor tells you’ is healthy—not the Physician, but those who say they represent Him?

We are told that salvation comes through Christ. It doesn’t matter what church or denomination is speaking, the Message is the same, because we all use the same Book. “Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst” (1 Timothy 1:15), and “God so loved the world that He gave His only-begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16).

Isn’t this what the whole mission of the Church is about, salvation through Jesus Christ? And isn’t this mission accomplished by following the simple command, “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit”? (Matthew 28:19).

Go, make disciples, baptize.
Can it be acceptable that churches do anything above and beyond these three things? Can it even be possible? Can we really think that we can add to the mission that Christ has already given us? Can we set priorities of our own that supersede what the Word Himself commands?
Go, make disciples, baptize.

A church says that we want the salvation of all, that we are offering the fallen world around us the gift of eternal life, vouchsafed to everyone who comes to Jesus and believes in Him.

Well, why aren’t they coming? Is that really how the Message entrusted to us works? Does the church go, do we make disciples, do we baptize, in that order? What have we put ahead of what we say we want? How can we have failed to realise that if we really want something, we remove all obstacles, and pursue it relentlessly?

We understand priorities in lesser things. How have we failed to apply the same principle to what we say is most important to us?
If we have to, what are we willing to give up to accomplish our mission? Have we really considered the question?
For there is really only one:

What price, salvation?

שגיון לדוד אשר שר ליהוה

Shiggayon l'David asher shar l'Adonay
a wild passionate song of David, that he sang to Yahweh

Unsovereign, Basil Doulos!
Your only tax, benevolence;
and jurisprudence, mercy.

Chthon of Heaven and its Ilios!
No fans cool you
for you are the breeze.
Fires cannot warm
the ignition of the cosmos.

Imprinted Logos of all creation!
Revealed, thrice-linked rings of Borromeo.
Uncovered, protogenoi of substance.
Proclaimed, mysteries of antiquity.
Exposed, mover unmoved.
Annunciation of life bearing the promise of the coming age.
Clarion of Zion awaking the dawn of the eighth day!
Holy, Holy, cry Holy!

Shatter us with a leap from the heart of man
Grant the grace of light to our eyes
Burn us with the beauty of your face
Draw back your completeness from us
That we might glimpse of your greatness
Though it pains us in our weakness

There is none righteous, no, not one
By your sacrifice, I have come to die.
There is none who understands
By your will, illumine me.
There is none who seeks after God.
By your power, draw my feet along the road which goes ever on.

Saints and apostles, martyrs and prophets,
Great fathers gone before us to rest
And our most beloved light-bearing mother
We who are empty cry at the gates of fullness
Burst open the walls of kingdom by grace offensive
Let the least of these enter and be entered in.

Amen.

Another Psalm, by David Dickens, at Nothing Hypothetical

Meet one another as friends

Take great care to keep guard over your tongue, so that no one speaks ill of his neighbor or plagues anyone by word or deed or gesture or any means whatever; and do not let yourself become so touchy that when a man hears a sharp word from a brother he is put out or makes a contentious answer or remains vexed with him. That is not the way of those who desire to be saved, that is not the way of the spiritual athlete. Go in search of the fear of God, but with discretion, so that you go to meet one another as friends.

— Dorotheos of Gaza

Don't give offense.

Don't take offense.

Forgive everybody everything right away.

Fulfill the law of Christ

An excellent ramble on Discipleship and the Cross can be found at Forty Days in the Desert blog, stemming from Dietrich Bonhoeffer's book The Cost of Discipleship. I encourage you to read the whole post, but here is a passage that hit home for me…

Most of the suffering in my life is self-wrought and fairly deserved. Where it is not deserved, as a good American I quickly want to cry "unfair!" But it is as this moment that perhaps I should be looking to see a cross flung down in my path to pick up and bear.

Perhaps it is my lot this day to bear the false accusation of another, in love, for Christ's sake.
Perhaps it is my lot this day to bear hatred from another in humble silence, for Christ's sake.
Perhaps it is my lot to be ridiculed unjustly, for Christ's sake.
Perhaps it is my lot this day to bear being cheated by another, for Christ's sake.
Perhaps there is even a cross which has been flung down before that I have refused to take up, unwilling to bear the burden because I have been unwilling to forgive "in the power of the cross of Christ in which I now share," as Bonhoeffer suggests.

Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.
St. Paul to the Galatians, 6:2

And he said to [them] all, If any [man] will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.
Gospel According to St. Luke, 9:23

Children

Weep, my people, weep, for your land,
Once a city set on a hill
that could not be hid,
Is now a byword for the nations,
who toss their heads and say,
“If Yahweh is their God,
Let Him help them!”

Land of riches, now despoiled,
Land of sons and daughters,
now defiled,
Land of promise, now defamed,
Land of free men, now reviled,
“If Yahweh is their God,
Let Him help them!”

To the bitter end of your revelry,
To the bitter end, take your pleasures,
No matter your children charred,
Passed through the fire of Molech,
Cry out to you,
“If Yahweh is your God…”

Now is the time of redemption
From the sickening tree.
Now the acceptable day
Of the Lord’s visitation.
He comes in the clouds
Despite the doubt of His people,
“If Yahweh is His God,
Let Him help Him.”

Living ikons of the Son of Man,
Weeping saltwater instead of myrrh,
Tears gushing more plentifully
Than miraculous, healing springs,
Crying out with one inaudible voice,
To lure pilgrimages to their tombs,
Waiting for the venerating kiss,
That dry bones may take on life,
“If Yahweh is your God,
Help us!”

Apostles Fast

A time of growth.

The seed has been planted,
now it sprouts and grows.
Fasting, praying, acts of love, the practicum of the hidden life in Christ.
All Saints day inaugurates.
Feast of the Holy Apostles concludes.

Mismatch of Old (Julian) and New (Gregorian) calendars often reduces this fast to as few days as one for those on the New calendar.
This year a better year, because even with the New calendar the fast is about a month long.
Old calendar is always 13 days longer, so a minimum of 14 days.

Why is the Apostles Fast the least popular?
It is not even announced.
It occurs during summer which is vacation and barbecue time
in the Western world.
It is considered nonessential.
What then of a life of sanctification?
What then of the apostolic life?

“For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.”
Matthew 6:21 KJV

After the time of growth, then the harvest.
After seed time and planting and growth,
the fields are white for harvest.
The Holy Apostles were sent to gather the harvest.
They were themselves prepared.
And what of their disciples?

“Pray ye therefore the Lord of the harvest, that he will send forth labourers into his harvest.”
Matthew 9:38 KJV

Good seed, bad soil

The Sower goes forth to sow.
In the Church we are thinking,
“We have the good seed, we are the good soil.”

The preacher preaches mightily, eloquently.
His youthful vigor alarms us.
We think, “My! How well he preaches!
He is the tallest priest in the diocese as well, and so handsome.
What a good witness he is.”
Then we settle in to be entertained.
Though bread of the Word is offered,
our eyes ice it, and we eat cake.

Does he realize what field he is dropping the good seed into?
Does he sense that his footprints will leave their mark
only for a moment?
Does his heart really believe what he is saying?
Has he been traduced, reviled, led out to be stoned
for his testimony?
Does he love it, to see the people smile?

The earth has brought forth her harvest,
but there are none to reap.
The crops gathered into the barn
have been sated.
The wedding feast has already begun,
and the doors have been sealed.
Poor unwise unvirgins, tattooed and pierced,
bad soil infertile of the good seed,
abandoned outside.

The Bridegroom come and knocking is told,
“No room here at the inn.”
But for those inside the banquet hall,
frolic and feast, without Him.
Where in the world can He go now?

“Open to me, my sister, my love, my dove, my undefiled: for my head is filled with dew, and my locks with the drops of the night.”
Song of Solomon 5:2 KJV

Praying the Psalms

This is my 800th post, and I want it to be special, so I am offering for a second time an encouragement to get back into the Word of God as one's prayer life. I dedicate it, moreover, to a precious brother who prays these psalms with me, though we live far from each other at present. He knows who he is, and so does the Lord. And I can say that knowing he is praying the psalms with me is one of my chief joys. "Better two than one by himself, since thus their work is really profitable" (Ecclesiastes 4:9 Jerusalem Bible).

Orthodox Christians have a lot of standard prayers that we can use when we pray, and many of us use them. If we're not careful, we can let addressing God this way become something like a personalized but still impersonal prayer wheel, spinning off words yet feeling justified because we've "said our prayers." Having a relationship with the living God can be bypassed this way, exchanged for something like a business agreement with a heavenly accounting firm.

If I make this sound like written prayers are to be avoided, that's not my intent. Formal prayers are there to launch us into the life of prayer. If we stop and linger with them, then we have no one but ourselves to blame. What I want to share with you today is some reflections on the Psalms, God's own "prayer book" which He has given us to teach us how to pray, what to pray for, when to pray, and by which He speaks back to us when we pray them faithfully.

The Book of Common Prayer of the Church of England established a very easy and consistent way to pray the Psalms. They arranged them in a 30 day cycle, dividing them up into morning and evening portions for each day. (I know some months have 31 days. See the note at the end of this post.) Rather than making things complicated by following the Lectionary or grouping psalms by content, they just started with Psalm 1 and divided them up as they come, ending with Psalm 150. No flipping back and forth of pages, that would only be a distraction. Just simple, Psalm 1, 2 and 3, and so on.

The first day of the month has eight psalms, but depending on length, some days have more or fewer. When you get to the longest psalm (and longest chapter of the Bible), we find that it takes two and a half days to pray it! But the first day has eight. Not too many, not too few.

To pray the Psalms, just make a point of going aside to a quiet and secluded place, your "prayer closet" as the Lord says, and that can be anywhere. Just don't take anything with you into that place but your Bible. Open it reverently. Kiss the Book if you dare and then, open it to the first psalm of the day. Today is November 1st [the original publication date of this post was November 1, 2007], so it's Psalm 1. Read this psalm, standing before the Father and in His presence. Though it may not seem like you're praying or asking the Lord for anything, in fact you are. Your very act of standing in His presence and reading His Word is the fact of prayer.
Go ahead, read it…

PSALM 1
Happy the man
who never follows the advice of the wicked,
or loiters on the way that sinners take,
or sits about with scoffers,
but finds his pleasure in the Law of Yahweh,
and murmurs his law day and night!
He is like a tree that is planted
by water streams,
yielding its fruit in season,
its leaves never fading;
success attends all he does.
It is nothing like this with the wicked, nothing like this!
No, these are like chaff
blown away by the wind.
The wicked will not stand firm when Judgment comes,
nor sinners when the virtuous assemble.
For Yahweh takes care of the way the virtuous go,
but the way of the wicked is doomed.

Then, just say "Amen!" to seal the praying of this psalm with your will and testimony. And continue to the next one, Psalm 2. Read it the same way, clearly, and listening to the words with your heart as well as your inner ear. This too is a prayer. Do you sense His presence with you in the room? While you're reading, praying, don't pay attention to anything outside yourself or any mental distractions. Pause if you want to pause, reread a line if you want to reread it. Pray the psalm through more than once, if you need to, before going on to the next one. Most of all, don't rush, don't put a worry about finishing by a certain time on yourself. You're standing in His presence, you're in His kairós (acceptable time) and have, in act, left the world.

Go ahead, continue with Psalm 2…

PSALM 2
Why this uproar among the nations?
Why this impotent muttering of pagans—
kings on earth rising in revolt,
princes plotting against Yahweh and his Anointed,
‘Now let us break their fetters!
Now let us throw off their yoke!’
The One whose throne is in heaven
sits laughing, Yahweh derides them.
Then angrily he addresses them,
in a rage he strikes them with panic,
‘This is my king, installed by me
on Zion, my holy mountain.’
Let me proclaim Yahweh’s decree;
he has told me, ‘You are my son,
today I have become your father.
Ask and I will give you the nations for your heritage,
the ends of the earth for your domain.
With iron sceptre you will break them,
shatter them like potter’s ware.’
So now, you kings, learn wisdom,
earthly rulers be warned:
serve Yahweh, fear him,
tremble and kiss his feet,
or he will be angry and you will perish,
for his anger is very quick to blaze.
Happy all who take shelter in him.

Again, say "Amen!" at the end of this psalm. You have only six more to go. By the time you get to Psalm 8, you'll not want to leave. Also, beginning with Psalm 3, you will find yourself standing in King David's place, sharing his prayer, noticing little by little how you can pray these words as coming from your very self! The first time this happens isn't the last. If you persevere in praying the Psalms, you will enter into the Biblical world, being taught how to address the living God, understanding more and more of His will for your life.

Soon enough, between reading each psalm, your personal prayers will begin lodging themselves, at first by words maybe, but then gradually by spiritual groanings (I can't find a better word, but I don't mean something negative by "groan"). It's impossible to explain, but as you faithfully pray the Psalms, not only does your personal prayer and dialog with the Lord become more real, more lasting, but soon, you will find that the Lord has been speaking to you more constantly and clearly than you had ever realized. This is what the Orthodox mean by "practicing theology" rather than studying it. This is where a personal relationship with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ becomes more than just an expression.

Anyway, back to the Psalms.
I could copy the rest of the Psalms into this post, but instead, I am just going to list the numbers, and let you go and pray them yourself. For those who want to try praying the Psalms, I will provide a list of the 30 day cycle. The Book of Common Prayer lists them as "morning" and "evening" psalms, but I have never divided them this way, and so my list excludes this. The Bible version I use is the original (not the New) Jerusalem Bible, but you should use any version that works for you. In my Bible I have added the day numerals using some rub-on numbers that I got at an art supply store. The image above is the Bible I use when praying (the sprig of laurel is a bookmark, picked up from last year's Descent into Hades service). This is just to give you an idea.

If God allows it, my intention is to continue this post on praying the psalms throughout the month, though I may not write something every day. I just wanted to share with you this ministry of God's Word to me, hoping that you too can be ministered to by the Word of God, for prayer, as I have been.

Praying the Psalms has been my main personal prayer life since I accepted the Lord at the age of 24. I have not been faithful or consistent with it, but it is the place I always return to whenever I notice I've been drifting. And why is this? Because the Lord is there, He's the faithful and the true, the only lover of mankind, the merciful Father, and I can always depend on Him to save me, and enfolded in His psalms I can come and stand before Him, with Jesus.

30 DAY CYCLE
Day 1 — Psalms 1-8
Day 2 — Psalms 9-14
Day 3— Psalms 15-18
Day 4 — Psalms 19-23
Day 5 — Psalms 24-29
Day 6 — Psalms 30-34
Day 7 — Psalms 35-37
Day 8 — Psalms 38-43
Day 9 — Psalms 44-49
Day 10 — Psalms 50-55
Day 11 — Psalms 56-61
Day 12 — Psalms 62-67
Day 13 — Psalms 68-70
Day 14 — Psalms 71-74
Day 15 — Psalms 75-78
Day 16 — Psalms 79-85
Day 17 — Psalms 86-89
Day 18 — Psalms 90-94
Day 19 — Psalms 95-101
Day 20 — Psalms 102-104
Day 21 — Psalms 105-106
Day 22 — Psalms 107-109
Day 23 — Psalms 110-115
Day 24 — Psalms 116-119:32
Day 25 — Psalm 119:33-104
Day 26 — Psalm 119:105-176
Day 27 — Psalms 120-131
Day 28 — Psalms 132-138
Day 29 — Psalms 139-143
Day 30 — Psalms 144-150
*Day 31 — Pray the psalms for the day of the month on which you were born.

Gates of Eden

Just felt like I needed to hear this song right now. Hope you don't mind. Here are the lyrics. (I don't know what the song means any more than you do. But it somehow feels true.)

Of war and peace the truth just twists
Its curfew gull it glides
Upon four-legged forest clouds
The cowboy angel rides
With his candle lit into the sun
Though its glow is waxed in black
All except when ’neath the trees of Eden

The lamppost stands with folded arms
Its iron claws attached
To curbs ’neath holes where babies wail
Though it shadows metal badge
All and all can only fall
With a crashing but meaningless blow
No sound ever comes from the Gates of Eden

The savage soldier sticks his head in sand
And then complains
Unto the shoeless hunter who’s gone deaf
But still remains
Upon the beach where hound dogs bay
At ships with tattooed sails
Heading for the Gates of Eden

With a time-rusted compass blade
Aladdin and his lamp
Sits with Utopian hermit monks
Sidesaddle on the Golden Calf
And on their promises of paradise
You will not hear a laugh
All except inside the Gates of Eden

Relationships of ownership
They whisper in the wings
To those condemned to act accordingly
And wait for succeeding kings
And I try to harmonize with songs
The lonesome sparrow sings
There are no kings inside the Gates of Eden

The motorcycle black madonna
Two-wheeled gypsy queen
And her silver-studded phantom cause
The gray flannel dwarf to scream
As he weeps to wicked birds of prey
Who pick up on his bread crumb sins
And there are no sins inside the Gates of Eden

The kingdoms of Experience
In the precious winds they rot
While paupers change possessions
Each one wishing for what the other has got
And the princess and the prince
Discuss what’s real and what is not
It doesn’t matter inside the Gates of Eden

The foreign sun, it squints upon
A bed that is never mine
As friends and other strangers
From their fates try to resign
Leaving men wholly, totally free
To do anything they wish to do but die
And there are no trials inside the Gates of Eden

At dawn my lover comes to me
And tells me of her dreams
With no attempts to shovel the glimpse
Into the ditch of what each one means
At times I think there are no words
But these to tell what’s true
And there are no truths outside the Gates of Eden

— Bob Dylan

Mercy

I traffic in trifling offenses, all the while playing games with God’s mercy, when I forget that the problem is not so much these sins of commission or omission, but the fact of my human existence being another instance of sin itself. I don’t need anyone to tell me that, and the proof is plain. I see it all around me in others. Why should it not be true of myself? The wages of sin is death, and despite the saving grace of God who came in my sinful flesh though He was the only Sinless One, I must die. What irony! That the only Man who should not have died because He alone is sinless, was put to death! Had we not killed Him, He would have lived forever in His sinless flesh. Which of these is easier, to say “Your sins are forgiven,” or “Raise yourself up from death on the third day”? To prove that His mercy is towards us, His Father through the Holy Spirit’s life-creating power, commanded Him, “Take up your body, and live again!” And that is what He did, and so Christ, having been voluntarily put to death, was raised to life, and is alive forever, as He declared to John on the island of Patmos (cf. Revelation 1:18), granting the world great mercy.

But as for me, I am the sinner. No one has to teach me what the grace and mercy of God is, or what it feels like to be the dwelling-place of Christ in the Holy Spirit. Christ living in me is so unlike the old man that His presence can sometimes feel like a fire that sears flesh and separates bone from bone, grating against hardened attitudes and wrong desires with soul-shattering intensity. No need to pretend that there is anything good in me of my own. Everything is grace, everything mercy and love poured out like cooling water over the furnace of my flesh, which in sins my mother conceived me, causing that cast-iron prison to break asunder, cracked open by the meeting of earthly and unearthly in me. There is no priest waiting for me to confess, waiting to ask me, “What’s on your list today?”
I know better than to play games with God’s mercy in the presence of His anointed, whose eyes and ears become those of my Master. I only cry to Him, “Lord, have mercy! All that I long for is known to You, my sighing is no secret from You. Take my life, and make it Yours. O Lord, for You alone are Holy.”

How strange it is, how unexpected, that salvation should work in this way: That what is to live forever, by grace, is incubated in something like a rotten timber, destined for the flames; that as it grows and takes the shape of its Maker’s will, it still must bear the humiliation of its origin in decay, until at last it is freed. But is it really strange, really unexpected? Yes, but only to our mortality, which cannot think beyond itself to see what mercy waits for those who sleep. Thinking it is awake, it only dreams, and left to itself, it never escapes its dreams. But blessed are those who sleep in the Lord, for they shall awake, and upon waking, they shall gaze their fill on His likeness.

Είη το όνομα Κυρίου ευλογημένον από του νυν και έως του αιώνος.
Blessed be the name of the Lord from this time forth and for ever more.

Simply ambassadors

The fathers say, "Love all men, but be familiar with very few."

The work of Christ, the work of His love for all men, that He desires to do in us and through us, is facilitated when we pay little or no attention to denominational details as we confront the world of both other Christians (many of whom are not really Christians yet) and non-Christians. Actually, it is not up to us to divide sheep from goats confessionally or morally. When encountering other Christians, we treat them in the same loving way as Christ has treated us, welcoming them without argument (in case their faith is weak or their doctrinal understanding incomplete or erroneous), and making it known to them that if they are followers of Jesus, then they belong to the Church, and that is Orthodoxy, not denominationally (since it is no denomination), but existentially. If a man is called to follow Jesus, and he answers that call, regardless of his understanding of it, then he is ipso facto a member of the Church, and the Spirit in us bears witness to that fact, and we must accept it.

The Church in its protocols and structures will do all it can to separate the sheep from the goats, the wheat from the chaff, but that is not what the disciples do. We are simply ambassadors, telling and demonstrating to others that the Church is love, mercy and forgiveness existentially, that it is safety, that it is welcome into the Kingdom of God, so that sensing no tollgates or border crossing officials, they can enter the court of the Gentiles where the Lord Himself can begin ministering to their inner man, bringing them gradually into the mind of Christ, being able to use us whom He has already redeemed and is fashioning into images of Himself, to transform them, adding them to our number. This He does in spite of the Church's external forms and protocols, not because of them. The real value of the Church's constructs is demonstrated only after the genuine conversion to Christ has occurred, and the new disciple really joins us in that school of righteousness that is not an external rule forced on us from the outside, but the content of our thankfulness to the God whom we now know has really saved us.

We no longer pretend to be sinners so as to pretend to be saved. We finally know the truth, and that sets us free: free to serve the living God not according to a written law, but according to a spiritual law that is now written in our hearts and is expressed every time we do what we see Him doing.

Not by us, Yahweh, not by us, by You alone is glory deserved,
by Your love and Your faithfulness.
Psalm 115 Jerusalem Bible

Lay aside all earthly cares

So much of what I see in Orthodox Christian blogdom and general communication is devoted to countering mistaken opinions and heresies ancient and modern, comparing our faith to that of other Christians not recognized by us for whatever reason. So much effort and toil, not to build up the welcoming Temple of the living God where all are treated as first-born sons and citizens of heaven, but instead to build higher walls and towers from which to grimly defend or sit in judgment on our brothers.

When I first encountered Orthodoxy, I too was astonished by its otherworldly beauty, I too was emboldened by its apparently reckless audacity in proclaiming the Gospel and affirming the whole Word of God. I too appreciated its various claims to be what it says it is, the original and true Church. And I too had my share of books like “Are You Saved?” and others sitting on my shelf, that dealt with telling Catholics and Protestants of every stripe how and why they are wrong. They are sitting there still.

There are ‘givens’ with the life in Christ which we have no right to trample, as we witness for Him to others both outside and inside the Christian faith. These ‘givens’ are found in the following of Jesus, and in company with His holy apostles. One of the greatest of these, and the one most commonly overlooked, is that we do not argue the faith we hold, or subject it even to comparison with that of others. Orthodoxy cannot be compared to other confessions of Christianity. Why? Because it includes them.

I used to have a sign hanging over my desk at work (yes, even in the professional world one is a witness) that said in Greek ‘We are Christ-bearers,’ and in English below it, ‘We accept no proselytes.’ That was my way of saying, “There is no division between you and me, in Christ, who loves us equally, shed His precious Blood for us equally, welcomes us equally into His presence, and intercedes for us equally as He stands before His Father. Let us love one another, and learn of Him together.”

Rather than a spirit of contention and controversy, the Christ-bearer has the Spirit of pleading unity, calling outsiders ‘brother’ before they have even realized yet, how much the Father has loved them in the Son. We welcoming them as if welcoming Christ, they are given a glimpse of a Kingdom so great that it has no real enemies, only souls waiting patiently in line for their own awakening. They are given a foretaste of a Banquet so rich that none is ever turned empty away. Why? Because they see us.

Enmity, that is what is already in place between the servants of the living God and those who follow their own lusts, in blindness, in nakedness, in deafness, while boasting of their possessions and authority real or imagined. All whose lives are still a mixture of willful sin and a yearning for righteousness, all who still try to hide from God, or without acknowledging Him or His unrepentant Law still seek to justify themselves in their own and others’ eyes, declare that we are at enmity with them.

But I am not speaking of these others, but of Christians like ourselves, who say they believe in the Word of God and all that proceeds from that belief. Do we ourselves believe in the prayer of Christ that we should all be one, as He and the Father are in each other and are One? Do we not believe that what Christ prays is answered by His Father with “Yes,” with “Amen”? We are the Church, there is no doubt about that. If we do believe, how could we think that the Church can ever really be divided?

Brothers, I am not talking church politics. I am not an ecumenist. All the meetings that church leaders ever put together will never bring about the unity that Christ prays us to have with one another. They are pushing not the will of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. They think they have sundered, and so they think to mend, the Body of Christ. But no. There is only One Body, and there is only One Christ, is, was, and to come. Let us finally lay aside all earthly cares, as we sing in every divine liturgy, that we may receive the King of all.

Let us lay aside all earthly cares, that we may receive the King of all, escorted by the angelic hosts, and welcoming Him and them in one another, let us follow Jesus, who never argued with, never scorned, even those who made themselves His enemies. His correction and teaching was His presence among them, betraying a greater love than they had ever thought possible. And in us, his living ikons, He is still walking the world, seeking, finding and gathering His lost sheep, welcoming them all into the Kingdom of His Father, not holding their faults against them, cleansing them of their sins by love, by His unflagging love, welcoming them in us.

If it is Orthodoxy you seek,
if it is Orthodoxy you proclaim,
it is only this…
Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.
John 15:13 KJV

It is love that heals

For several weeks the thought keeps coming to me,
“It is not medicine that heals, it is love.”

I’ve said it to people in conversation, even to my personal physician on my last visit. I’ve written it to my closest friends in messages and emails. I’ve thanked God for it, the healing that comes from love, not just from the feeling of love, but from the actions that love inspires. I’ve reminisced how I used to hold my sons when they were very young, and sick with fever, sitting on my lap facing me, bare chest to bare chest, rocking them gently to calm them and to absorb the fever from their hot bodies into my cool one, or how as a sick and frightened child, one of them would slip into papa’s bed, to sleep in safety. And I’ve thought about the strange sharing of others’ sicknesses and distress by holding them close to my heart, spiritually, by prayer, and how they have done the same for me. As holy apostle Paul writes, “If one part suffers, every part suffers with it” (1 Corinthians 12:26), to which verse my experiences have given very personal meaning.

Today, Presbytera Candace quoted me a word from Elder Païsios, one of my teachers, in which he describes this same idea, that it is love that heals. The elder writes,

“You must make the other person’s pain your own, and then pray from your heart. Love is a divine attribute, and informs the other person [that you are praying for him]. Even in hospitals, when doctors and nurses feel genuine compassion for their patients, this is the most effective of all the medications to give to them. The patients feel they are being cared for with love, and have a sense of certainty, security and consolation. You do not need to say much to someone who is suffering, or try to instruct him. He understands that you feel his pain and care about him, and he is helped by this. Feeling his pain is everything. If we feel compassion for others, we forget ourselves and our problems.”

— Elder Paisios of the Holy Mountain (Athos)

Κοινωνία – Fellowship

I hadn’t thought to write anything about fellowship, κοινωνία (kee-no-NEE-ah), but for two coincidences: I had a great time of fellowship, as well as a discussion about it, with my koumbaro just yesterday. And today, I read a post by Fr Stephen that included some relevant thoughts on κοινωνία.

From yesterday’s visit with my koumbaro, two points were brought home to me very strongly: Real fellowship, that is, κοινωνία, is extremely rare. What most people call ‘fellowship’ in Christ appears to be making merry with your ‘Christian’ friends. Actually, there was a third point: We can have no real fellowship with others, even other ‘Christians’, even other people who go to the same church with us, any more than we can have real fellowship with the world, if they and we are not of the same ‘mind of Christ.’ “…and what fellowship to light with darkness? and what concord to Christ with Belial? or what part to a believer with an unbeliever?”
(2 Corinthians 6:15, Young’s Literal Translation).

My koumbaro and I were surprised by the attitude of some people, who think that fellowship with the world is possible. They are mistaken, not understanding what real fellowship is because they have not tasted it themselves, nor have they decided to make the Word of God their home, which is the only way to have the ‘mind of Christ.’ Instead, they have taken on a multiplicity of teachers, letting their minds be tossed to and fro with the latest humanistic thinking, when there is really Only Christ, who says, “Nor are you to be called 'Teachers,' because you have only one teacher, the Messiah!” (Matthew 23:10, ISV)

I can’t explain this any better than a great article I found on the internet today, at Wikiversity…

κοινωνία is a principle applied to deep communal sharing. A stunning passage that demonstrates this principle is the opening section of John's first general letter (1 John 1). He uses the first person plural "we" referring to the fact that Peter, James and he saw something on that mountain top. (Matthew 17:1-9, Mark 9:1-10, Luke 9:28-36). This letter was written long after James has been killed, but John is being inclusive of other eyewitnesses to a myriad of additional remarkable events including the ascension and the subsequent miraculous manifestations of healing and deliverance. By verse three he has included the rest of the ἐκκλησία (the called out) of his day and is including even us, the readers, into the collective for a purpose...

"...that which we have seen and heard declare we unto you also, that ye also may have fellowship with us: yea, and our fellowship is with the Father, and with his Son Jesus Christ:"

Then in verse three he states the remarkable purpose for writing the general epistle:

"...and these things we write, that our joy may be made full."

The Greek phrase for "our joy" doesn't connote simply himself, his co-authors and the assembly of the believers of his day. It is an extremely plural second person inclusion meaning "our collective joy" – Peter, James, John, and the other eight, The Seventy, The First Century Church, The Seven Churches, The Father, The Son, you and me. "Our joy may be made full" in the Ancient Greek language has not yet been fully translated into English. This expansion of context comes from the true meaning of an Ancient Greek word translated into English as "fellowship" - κοινωνία.

Modern usage of the word "fellowship" especially in a "church" setting has been reduced to getting together once or twice a week to listen to some guy "preach" and then maybe have sandwiches and coffee downstairs in the "fellowship hall". This meaning is nowhere close to κοινωνία in the context of communion and oneness.

I mentioned that Fr Stephen has written a post examining the concept of κοινωνία, and here I quote the relevant passage, which addresses the idea of fellowship (calling it by another name, ‘communion’) with the world versus real fellowship…

Christianity is losing the battle of ideas – if only because Christianity is not an idea. The faith once and for all delivered to the saints is a way of life – a true communion in the life of God. It is God who makes Himself present to us in our world and not just in our heads. It is true that if we allow ourselves to have true communion with Him, He will heal our thoughts as well – given time.

Communion with the secular world is a communion of emptiness. Its ideas are false and its promises are not true. At the end of the secular world lies only death – from which no idea will save us.

Only one thing further I would like to add, and that is this: When once you have tasted true fellowship with another human being in Christ, you know there is no going back to mere play-acting and church protocol, no more pretending that “all is as it should be.” Instead, you want to do everything that accords with that fellowship, and you want to do nothing that endangers it. Why? Because in that real fellowship, Jesus Christ is no longer a mere idea if He ever was, but He is the risen and present Lord who mediates between man and man in such a way that men can truly be of one will, heart and mind. This fellowship is the miracle of the incarnate Body of Christ, what the institutional Church is at least an ikon of, though by the prayer of Christ, “that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you” (John 17:21 NIV), it should be more.

I offer these reflections with a prayer of thanks to God for letting me taste this true fellowship, and to encourage all the brethren to settle for nothing less, but to even become wanderers and pilgrims in the earth—if they have to—to find it, because it is nothing less than what the Father wants of us, to be in real fellowship with Him and with one another.

Δόξα τω Θεώ.

Only three know

The expression ‘common knowledge’ refers to things that are known by nearly everyone. A large part of what we know on a daily basis falls into this category. At the other end of the spectrum, there are things that are known by relatively few people, specialized knowledge perhaps. At the opposite extreme from common knowledge there is a zero point for shared knowledge in every individual human being. These are things that only three know. Who are these three? They are yourself, your confessor, and Christ.

We take great care to hide our sins from ourselves and from other people. We’re aware that God knows everything about us, yet we sometimes try to hide our sins even from Him. We are no different from Adam and Eve who covered themselves with fig leaves and hid among the trees of the Garden. Yet the fact is that we sin, and we don’t want to admit it, either from shame or because it would spoil our good reputations. But there is a remedy to our dilemma, to let only three know, and see what happens.

The one to whom we choose to divulge our great secret, that we sin, who can it be? Is it the parish priest, who is always there but not always available? Perhaps if we told him ‘about that’ he would look at us differently, he’d know too much about us and, even though we know he wouldn’t tell anyone, could we stand to look him in the eye after telling him ‘about that’? Maybe it’s a priest in another parish whom we don’t have to see on a weekly basis. That way it could be somewhat anonymous.

I can’t tell you who should be your confessor, the one to whom you confess your sins, but I can tell you this: It should be someone whom you trust, someone who will still love you no matter what you tell him, and that person can be anyone.

It should be someone whom you know will love you and respect you even more after you have confessed your sin than he did before you confessed. It should be someone who loves you enough to wait with you until your heart is ready, and whose gentle coaxing, ‘Tell me,’ loosens the words in your throat. He will not shame you, he will rejoice with you. He will not punish you, he will reward you. He will not bind you, he will free you. He will not let you remain blind, he will give you sight. He will not let you remain sick, he will heal you. He will stand aside and let Christ receive you to Himself. He will let Christ clothe you in the wedding garment of His righteousness and put His betrothal ring on your finger. And he will forget your sin just as Christ does, and invite you to sup with him, and with Him, at the wedding feast of the Lamb.

This is what happens, when you let only three know.


If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives.

My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have one who speaks to the Father in our defense—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world.

1 John 1:7-2:2



A blessed Apostles' Fast to all!

Only One is worthy

I wrote the following few words to a brother in a private letter, but someone else needs to hear this, so here it is...

Only One is worthy,

and we know it,

and we know Him.

So as we go suffering as He suffers,

rejoicing as He rejoices,

let's keep following Him,

and decide to do now and always

exactly what He asks,

no matter what it looks like,
no matter whom it may offend,

no matter what it feels like,

but without malice,

without superiority,

without resentment.

People sometimes say that Orthodoxy is the hardest form of Christianity. I bet those same people are going to start out the Apostles' Fast with a barbecue, and finish it with another one, and then party in between for all they're worth, and then to show their devotion, pack the church to the doors. They don't know what they're saying or what they're doing.

Orthodoxy is the hardest because it is the Cross,

and it is the lightest because it is Jesus.

And to be at His side,

no matter what happens to us by day or night,
is why we live.

Who pleads for you?

My hope is the Father,
my refuge is the Son,
my protection is the Holy Spirit:
O Holy Trinity, glory to Thee.
from the service of Compline

One is Holy,
One is Lord,
Jesus Christ
to the glory of God the Father.
Amen.
from the Divine Liturgy

Lord, God Almighty, You alone are holy. You accept a sacrifice of praise from those who call upon You with their whole heart. Receive also the prayer of us sinners and let it reach Your holy altar. Enable us to bring before You gifts and spiritual sacrifices for our sins and for the transgressions of the people. Make us worthy to find grace in Your presence so that our sacrifice may be pleasing to You and that Your good and gracious Spirit may abide with us, with the gifts here presented, and with all Your people. Through the mercies of Your only begotten Son with whom You are blessed, together with Your all holy, good, and life giving Spirit, now and forever and to the ages of ages.
from the Divine Liturgy, prayer of the Proskomidí

With God on our side, who can be against us? Since God did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up to benefit us all, we may be certain, after such a gift, that He will not refuse anything He can give. Could anyone accuse those that God has chosen? When God acquits, could anyone condemn? Could Christ Jesus? No! He not only died for us—He rose from the dead, and there at God’s right hand He stands and pleads for us.
Romans 8:31-34 Jerusalem Bible

He… has offered one single sacrifice for sins, and then taken His place for ever, at the right hand of God, where He is now waiting until His enemies are made into a footstool for Him. By virtue of that one single offering, He has achieved the eternal perfection of all whom He is sanctifying.
Hebrews 10:12-14 JB

The art of things unsaid

One of the pieces of family history that my dad handed over to me when I visited him in Florida last April was a wonderful black and white photo of my favorite ‘aunt and uncle,’ as we say, that is, Uncle Hank and Aunt Irene (we reverse the order when calling them by name). That's the young couple in the photograph above. On the back of the photograph is neatly handwritten ‘April 16, 1950’ and my guess is, it was taken on the back porch of the second or third floor of a flat in Chicago.

What strikes me instantly and deeply is the look on my aunt's face, her beautiful face, a look that cannot be put into words, yet I can read it, full of things unsaid. My uncle looks off to his right with his characteristic ‘you can't pull a fast one on me’ face, or maybe it was just the look of ‘no matter what you say or do, I'm here.’ A look of somewhat light-hearted but matter-of-fact faithfulness. But it's Aunt Irene's look that holds me, I can't get away from it. She really loved Hank, and he really loved her. Till death do us part.
(Click the image to enlarge the photograph for a closer look.)

Uncle Hank was 38 and Aunt Irene was half a year from her 39th birthday. They had been married 15 years less one month. They were dairy farmers, running their southern Wisconsin farm at Slades Corners near Genoa City single-handed most of the time. That meant they almost never got away. We had to go and see them. Their farm was where I spent some of my boyhood summers. Aunt Irene was never able to bear children. Uncle Hank never let his disappointment ‘mount as far as his throat’ as the Desert Fathers say. He simply loved his wife and never let anything get in the way of that, not even their childlessness. And what wonderful parents they would have made. Yet, that's not what the Lord wanted for them.

As they had no children, my dad became the inheritor of their few memorabilia, and now he has turned them over to me. I still use Uncle Hank's bulky cast aluminum electric drill—with two handles to hold onto for dear life—probably from the first generation of power tools. But other than a few small artefacts, and some photos, I have little else… except for their official documents, birth, baptism and marriage certificates. It is their marriage certificate in its dusty grey slipcover that I found most interesting when I first inherited it after Aunt Irene reposed (Uncle Hank had pre-deceased her by ten years or so).

Behind the certificate in its tassled cover was another document, titled “How to Perpetuate The Honeymoon.” The credits under the title read, ‘From Home and Health, by permission of W. H. DuPuy, A. M., D. D.’ In that document are given twelve pieces of good advice for keeping a good marriage. Perhaps in another post I will list them all, but the tenth bit of advice caught my attention and I remembered it, and when I first saw the photograph that I've posted above, I thought of it.
This is the advice…

Do not allow yourself ever to come to an open rupture.
Things unsaid need less repentance.

The first sentence is boldfaced as the header for what follows, in this case only one more sentence (some of the others have a short paragraph). What follows is the instruction for achieving what the header advises. In only five words, it describes a truth of unlimited application. Another version of the same but less pointed might be an even shorter saying, ‘Silence is golden.’ All of these, of course, come from the bible, but in 1935, official documents were already trying to avoid bringing that up. Christianity was on its way to being put in the archives. The modern age was about to begin.

Things unsaid need less repentance. I want to keep thinking about this some more. Father Stephen has just posted for All Saints Day some similar thoughts. He also writes about things unsaid, “We live in a voyeuristic culture that reveals what should never be revealed and finds itself morbidly fascinated by hidden things. The hiddenness of the heart is part of modesty and humility…” His application is slightly different, but in the main I think we're both contemplating the same thing—the value of leaving certain things unsaid.
The longer I live, the more value I see in leaving things unsaid.

Why? Not to keep people guessing, not as leverage in a situation, but simply because some things cannot be explained or reported using language. This is where other forms of communication come in, like my aunt's look.

And not everything unsaid that can be passed to others by non-verbal means is meant for everyone in the first place, but like that white stone Jesus promises in the book of Revelation (2:17), it's only readable by the one to whom it is given.

As it is the feast of All Saints, I want to commemorate my aunt and uncle, two unsung saints that I was blessed to know, and to hold high their love and faithfulness to each other and to those whom the Lord sent them. Eternal be your memory, beloved Hank and Irene, for you are worthy of blessedness and life in the world to come.

Αιωνία η μνήμη.

The light of Your face

Something I read in at Pandeli’s blog, which didn’t grab my attention when I first read it, keeps coming back to me. He was expanding upon the thoughts of Home that I had written recently, and he added several more points. The point about nostalgia, longing for home, was the one that caught my first attention, probably because I have read this in the writings of C. S. Lewis and was familiar with it. We are born longing for our true home, and that is not this world, but the world to come.

What is persistently tugging at my soul right now is what Pandeli wrote about the Transfiguration of Jesus Christ on Mount Tabor…

Home is the place where we feel most safe, where no-one and nothing can hurt us. The three disciples who witnessed the Transfiguration felt like they were home and thus Peter said to Christ, ‘Lord, it is good for us to be here...’. We are not always close to home, but it will always have a special place in our hearts. Christ asks us to let Him into our home and into our hearts, so that we may enter His home.

“The three disciples who witnessed the Transfiguration felt like they were home and thus Peter said to Christ, ‘Lord, it is good for us to be here...’.”

People speak of ‘mountain top experiences,’ and I think what they are really referring to is what happened on Mount Tabor, but now in this biblically illiterate culture what usually comes to mind is a photograph of someone standing on a mountain top and saying ‘Aaaah…’ while looking at the world laid out below. Though nature can be beautiful, super-nature is awesome, the only awesome.

But the experiences we have with God—even secular people are starting to call any ‘over the top’ experience or thought a ‘theophany’—are events that we wish could continue, that we want to be permanent, as Peter did when he said, ‘Let us make three tents, one for You, one for Moses, and one for Elijah.’ We notice that not Jesus, but the Father responded, ‘This is My Son, the Beloved. Listen to Him.’ (Mark 9:5-8 passim) And the tents were not made—how could they have been?

This is yet another aspect of the idea of Home, one that I experience sometimes even every day, in fact anytime I can spend some time with a precious friend: I want it to last. But on and on time must go, and we have things to do, and so we part and go back to our lives in this world. And this is part of God’s plan, His divine οικονομία, ikonomía, for us: To never let us become so at home in this world that we forget the world to come, where we will be with Him, seeing Him and speaking with Him face to face, because we will have proved victorious.

Lord, have mercy on us and let us see the light of Your face, here in this present world when we are together, and in the day without night of the world to come.